Death and Life

I had a really interesting conversation last night with an incredible group of incoming Wartburg students. We were sitting around at a welcome event hosted by Spiritual Life and Campus Ministry and they started asking me the most amazing questions about why I became a Pastor and what such a life is like. Eventually we got on the topic of their own hopes and fears and I was absolutely blown away by their honesty and insightfulness.

At one point we were talking about a great class that my colleague Pastor Ramona teaches called "Living with Death". All of the students I hoped to one day take the course, and one young woman even admitted that she's terrified of dying. We had a great talk about why we fear death, the hope of the Gospel, and fear of the unknown.

Today I came across this article from a Hospice Nurse who shares the top five regrets of the dying patients she's worked with over the years. Nothing terribly surprising but I was intrigued by how many regrets had to do with going along with the expectations of others rather than living the lives we are meant to lead.

I'm so glad that I had that conversation with our new students. Moments like that remind me why I do what I do. I'm also glad for that conversation because these students are thinking about big questions even before officially starting College. That bodes well for the future.

I don't know that we ever get over the fear of death, but having fewer regrets seems to be a good place to start. If I could give one piece of advice to all our incoming students (and to myself) it would be to listen...truly listen...to the person God created you to be. There are so many voices competing for attention in our lives, both those of others and our own. It's hard to step back and listen for who we really are when you're worried about finding a job and living the American dream. And yet if we don't it's even harder to choose the things that matter.

One of my favorite quotes about vocation comes from Parker Palmer's book "Let Your Life Speak". He says "“Before I can tell my life what I want to do with it, I must listen to my life telling me who I am.” I can't wait for another year of listening with students to our lives and what they are telling us about who we are.

Who knows...maybe knowing our mortality is the best way to live a better life?

Young Adults: Sinners and Saints...just like the rest of us.

Last week's time magazine cover story "The Me, Me, Me Generation" argues that young adults are self obsessed narcissists who care only about themselves. This assertion is in sharp contrast with other generational studies that say Millenials (18-33 year olds) are idealistic, altruistic, and want to make a difference in the world.

So who's right? Are young adults narcissists or saints?

Well, according to Elspeth Reeve in "The Atlantic Monthly"they may be both. Reeve rightly points out that every modern generation has been deemed narcissistic at one time or another. "Basically, it's not that people born after 1980 are narcissists, it's that young people are narcissists, and they get over themselves as they get older." This doesn't necessarily mean that they aren't also idealistic and dedicated to helping others.

Martin Luther once famously said that we are "at the same time both sinners and saints". This is a human challenge not merely a generational one.

Guest Post: Samantha Heinen '15

During our Wednesday evening worship services at Wartburg we have a time for student testimonies. It's an opportunity for students to share what God has been up to in their lives, or talk about a particular cause or idea that is important to them. I am constantly amazed by the honesty and insight of the students who share their testimony, and from time to time I will share them on this blog as a window into the faith lives of young adults.

Samantha Heinen is a Sophomore at Wartburg who is majoring in Business. She is an All-Conference Golfer and is one of our worship curators (planners). She shared this testimony on Wednesday night at Eucharist and with her permission I'm sharing it with you. Her story testifies to the frustration and joy young adults experience in the Church. I hope you enjoy it.

Hello Everyone!  I hope you all had a fantastic break!  I know mine was especially brightened when I was working at the W one day and Pastor Brian came up asking if I wanted to do the first testimony of this semester.  I responded like I imagine many before me have with a hesitant, “uuuhh-yeaaaaah.”  So, I started thinking what could possibly be interesting enough about my life that you all would be willing to sit here and not fall asleep, and if I’m being honest, there wasn’t a lot.  But after a while I thought maybe I could talk about my experience in Pittsburgh at the Presbyterian Church USA’s 220th General Assembly.

Now, many of you probably just had the same reaction I did when I first heard about it, “Uh, excuse me the general who? And what are the Presbyterians up to now?”  Well the way the General Assembly was explained to me is that every Presbytery chooses participants.  A presbytery is a district of churches, for example I attend church in Cedar Falls but our presbytery ranges from Story City to Mason City.  Each of the 173 presbyteries in the United States choose two pastors and two elders called commissioners and one Young Adult Advisory Delegate or YAAD to go to Pittsburgh for about nine days.

Before you arrive, you are randomly sorted into committees where for two days at the Assembly you review and make changes to proposals that churches have submitted for all sorts of laws, amendments, and other Presbyterian things. After that everyone comes together in a big group called Plenary where the committees make their proposals.  These committees get up close and personal with the issues so when they come to Plenary everyone else can argue the same issues before taking the large group vote.  There is much more that goes into it but that’s sort of a brief overview.  So, I was like yeah sure free trip to Pittsburgh and I get to learn how the church works, awesome!  Let’s just say I had no idea what I got myself into.

What I did know was that there were two big issues said to be dividing the church, one was Civil Union and Marriage Issues and the other was Middle East Peacemaking.  So, for instance, at the assembly I would always introduce myself, “Hi, I’m Samantha from the North Central Iowa Presbytery and I am on the Middle East Peacemaking Committee.”  Which would usually have a response like, “Oooh… Good luck.”

So, after months of people telling me, we are so proud of you, you’re the future of the church, yada yada, I was finally going to Pittsburgh.  I got there, met some friends, walked around this huge city, and let me tell you it was incredible!  And the food, I swear they put French fries on everything there; sandwiches, salads, you name it!  So, I thought, “yeah, this isn’t going to be so bad.”  However the next day we had YAAD training…  The leaders start off saying things like plenary, Robert’s Rules of Order, John Calvin, call the question, make an amendment to the amendment’s amendment.  I’m just sitting there, blank face, “What?” while everyone else is going, oh yes, tell us more about the rule of crystallization.  Don’t worry I wasn’t completely hopeless, the guy next to me was sleeping the whole time, so I was probably alright.

After about a day of that, one thing I did gather was that we had to elect a moderator who ran along with a vice moderator, sort of like the president and vice president of the General Assembly.  Eventually the commissioners voted in majority for Neal Presa and Tara Spuhler McCabe.  However, the next day, for the first time in 220 assemblies our vice moderator resigned.  Prior to the vote Neal had mentioned that Tara had signed a marriage certificate for a lesbian couple even though the PCUSA constitution defines marriage as between a man and a woman.  Because of this, certain commissioners took part in online bullying and threatened to walk out on the assembly.

This is where I had to stop.  I couldn’t believe it.  These were adults, role models, acting with such juvenile behavior.  So quick to judge and throw a fit just because they didn’t get their way.  But this made me think, this is the same perception that many people have of Christians.  My own friends have told me that when they think about going to church all they see are the preachy people who can only fathom their own beliefs and push them on other people.

This was one of many unexpected events at the general assembly which ended up giving my pastor cause to say, “I am so sorry you had to be chosen for this GA.”  She said that and all I could think was I wouldn’t trade the experience for the world.  Through the General Assembly I felt the worst disappointment I have ever gone through in my life, but I was also filled with the most joy.  I got to see a completely different world, experience amazing worship, and meet the most wonderful people.  But what truly made this General Assembly the most meaningful for me was that even after seeing first hand all the awful things that were happening, the division in the church, and the politics of it all, there was still hope.  You could feel it when all of the formality stopped and 1000 people came together to pray.  In those moments it didn’t matter who you were, just that we were all there for one purpose, for God.

Through the process, people were hurt and felt the sting of disappointment, and even though it appeared like it was the worst GA ever,  I believe it showed that every one of those people were passionate.  They all cared so much that they were willing to take a week out of their busy lives to come to Pittsburgh and work all day even into the early morning to improve their church.  Hope.  That is what I found at the General Assembly.  Throughout the week we heard about how the church is dying, however that’s not what I saw, I saw the life of the church in every one of the 170 Young Adult Advisory Delegates and I see it in everyone here today.

You know, they say we are the future of the church, but that’s not the whole story, we are the church and right now we have the power to make a difference and the ability to share the love and respect that this world so desperately needs.

In conclusion I would like to thank all of you.  Thank you for coming to Eucharist and thank you for being my hope.

Mental Health on College Campuses

There was an interesting story on NPR yesterday about the increasing need for mental health services among College students. We have a very good counseling Center on campus with two full time professionals and both my colleague Pastor Ramona and I provide support for students with mental health concerns.

This is a topic near and dear to my heart because it was in College that I first began receiving treatment for depression and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. It's been a long journey that included a three day hospital stay in 2000, but I'm immensely grateful for the help I've received.

Whether or not the rate of depression, anxiety and other mental health disorders among College students is increasing is hard to say. It's quite possible that the increase in students seeking professional help is a result of a greater openness to treatment, but I don't think anyone would dispute that those receive treatment are just the tip of the iceberg.

Faith can be an incredibly helpful resource in dealing with mental illness but oftentimes people of faith are the least likely to seek help. There is a destructive belief that seeking help for a mental illness is a sign that one's faith isn't strong enough. (If you believe that rubbish, read through the Psalms sometime)

On the contrary I would argue that dealing with the pain of depression brought me closer to God. This makes sense when we realize that God is most clearly revealed in the places we least expect. On the cross in suffering and weakness. This is a God who does not run away from our pain but instead meets us there, and brings us out on the other side.

So my advice to College students that are struggling with mental health issues is to get help. Ironically admitting weakness and powerlessness is the most honest thing that any human being can do. Depression and other mental health challenges simply bring the reality of our dependance on God into clearer focus.

You are not alone in facing these challenges, and there is hope. Step forward into the darkness and discover that you're not alone, and it isn't as scary as you might think.

Understanding "The First Year Out"...and beyond

I've been reading an excellent book called "The First Year Out: Understanding American Teens after High School", a sociological study of teenagers in their first year after High School graduation. In the book author Tim Clydesdale shares a number of interesting insights about young adults that are helpful for those in ministry, higher education, and related fields.

In particular Clydesdale challenges the idealistic belief of many in Higher Education that students enter their first year of College ready for life altering experiences. He writes,

The first year out, rather than being a time when behavior patterns and life priorities are reexamined and altered, is actually a time when prior patterns and priorities become more deeply habituated. What the vast majority of teens focus on during their first year out is daily life management: they manage the semiadult relationships that now characterize their social interactions; they manage their adult freedoms to use substances and be sexually active; and they manage expanded responsibilities for their daily life, including money, food, and clothes.

This resonates with my own experiences with first year College students. Learning to live on your own is an incredibly time consuming experience and is exacerbated by the proliferation of choices for young adults. Although first year College students tend to come in with somewhat idealistic expectations about examining their lives it doesn't take long for the pressures of "daily life management" to become the priority.

Each year Campus ministry and other other co curricular groups on our campus begin with large numbers of participants. By about the third week of classes we see a precipitous drop off in student engagement as they become busier.

The things that take priority are those that are required for daily life management...classes, friends, work, and extracurricular activities like music and sports that can require participation. That leaves participation in voluntary student activities like religious groups and other organizations at a disadvantage. Although there are always a committed core of students involved with these groups, getting more than casual participation from the broader student population is difficult.

The main way that we've worked to address this challenge in our ministry is to make place for both groups of people. With the relatively small minority of students that are determined to be involved we do more intensive sorts of discipling and leadership development.

We hope that this formation process helps them to think missionally, recognizing where God is already at work on campus and joining in that work. But we also have to make space for the larger majority who are either casual participants or uninterested in engagement.

I'll admit that accepting this reality is one of the hardest things about my job as a Campus Pastor. I of course want everyone to be involved, and when that doesn't happen I can tend to take it personally. Reading books like "The First Year Out" have really helped me better understand the many challenges that our students face and make space for them to be who they are.

Even though it's hard to be patient, I really do believe it's my job as Campus Pastor to love and accept all of our students unconditionally....or should I say incarnationally.

I've actually developed a mantra to remind myself of that. It's borrowed from theologian Andy Root who says "It's hard to have a relationship with someone if you're always trying to change them". That's such an important reminder for doing ministry with people their "first year out"...or at any age.